| Horror World http://horrorworld.org/msgboards/ |
|
| FINALITY http://horrorworld.org/msgboards/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=12287 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | Edward Lee [ Sun Aug 12, 2012 10:38 pm ] |
| Post subject: | FINALITY |
Friends: my mother died shortly after midnight on Saturday, at Woodside Hospice in Pinellas Park, FL. Her previous few days in the hospital made it clear that hospice care was in order. (The place looked like a Hilton Hotel inside, and I was astonished to hear that Medicare covered it 100 percent.) I actually had her transported to the hospice about noon that day, and was able to stay until 10:30 pm. By this point, however, she was unable to engage in voluntary movement and was essentially comatose; the dr. said also that she'd appeared to have suffered multiple strokes and informed me that all cognitive function was probably gone. She was likely unable to feel pain but she given morphine anyway, which made me very happy. At the hospital I practically had to threaten to perform headers on the nurses in order to get them to administer the morphine every two hours. I'd picked up a boombox and a Sinatra's Greatest Hits CD, and had that on repeat; I'm so hoping that perhaps some filament of cognition remained for her to hear that, cos she loved Sinatra. I left the hospice at 10:30pm to go home and take my blood pressure meds, then went to bed with the intention of getting up at 3 or 4am to return but just as I was nodding off, the phone rang, and I knew it was "The Call." So I took a cab back to view my mother's body a final time, called the funeral home, made the necessary appointment, and that was it. In all, it was an example of the situation we've all been familiar with one time or another, that her passing was a blessing, because my mother would've HATED the idea of her being alive in that state even for a few hours much less several days. The horror writer in my had a mental of her dead body sitting bolt upright on the bed and yelling at me for letting her life even that long! Earlier in the day the experience was really awful due to her breathing sounds as her respiratory system slowly failed, and I didn't think I'd be able to hack it another minute but in some inexplicable momentary stasis something clicked in my head and it wasn't awful anymore, it was just natural taking its course. My mother had a good life and was very grateful for everyone of her 89 years. Her last word to me occurred in the hospital on Tuesday when I entered the room said, "Hi, Mom," she her eyes fluttered and she said undeniably "Hi," in return, in a vocal emphasis that tells me she knew who I was. Earlier today (Sunday) had had The Meeting with the funeral home director, and the experience was wonderfully macabre. The dude was a perfect "ghoul": solemn, polite, with a low, reverberant voice, driving the stereotypical black Cadillac, wearing an immaculate charcoal gray suit, and yet possessed of just a tiny bit of professional "sleaze" that all men of this trade seem to possess. I know my mother would've liked him, and I liked him so much I gave him a 90 dollar tip. As per my mother's wishes, she will be cremated, and the ashes of her favorite dog will be pleased in the urn with her ashes. The one adjuration of hers that I disobeyed was the urn: she told me to buy the cheapest one, even saying once something like "Put my damn ashes in a WalMart bag if you want. What difference will it make? Don't you dare waste you money on an expensive urn!" Well, the cheapest urn was 50 bucks; it looked like a friggin shoebox so I bought a nice looking carved wooden box for 300 which is large enough her her ashes and the dog's. The urn and her death certificates will take a week to 10 days and since I'm leaving for Poland on the 21st, I'll likely be picking everything up after my return on August 27th, and then flying back to MD to start the will and probate thing. She has a paid for grave plot next to my father's in Montgomery County, MD, but I won't be interring her urn until her birthday on May 13th. For all of your prayers, encouraging words, and good wishes, I am infinitely grateful. An author couldn't ask for a better, finer, classier, and more thoughtful readership. Again, thank you. Now I'm going to decompress and watch a movie called 100th Street Haunting, another paranormal activity ripoff that looks pretty good: bunch of people investigating the home of Richard Speck! Best wishes as always, Edward Lee |
|
| Author: | BigT [ Sun Aug 12, 2012 11:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I'm very sorry to hear about your mom, Ed. My thoughts will be with you and my deepest sympathy. ~Tony Beals |
|
| Author: | dutchgorelover [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 2:45 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Very sorry to hear. My condolances. Deepest sympathy. |
|
| Author: | peteboiler [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 6:11 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My most heartfelt, deepest sympathies Lee... Bob |
|
| Author: | BrentJenkins [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 10:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Condolences. Your mother was lucky to have a son that took such loving care of her in her final years. |
|
| Author: | Wetbones [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 4:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My sincerest condolences, Ed. |
|
| Author: | bishopblack [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 6:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My heart goes out to you, Ed. It is never easy to bury your parent, especially your mother. I wish you the best now and in the future. B. |
|
| Author: | JameyWebb [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 7:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Sorry to hear that Ed. My deepest condolences go out to you. Jamey |
|
| Author: | KK Jones [ Mon Aug 13, 2012 7:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I'm so sorry. My deepest sympathy to you. Konnie |
|
| Author: | flahorrorwriter [ Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Lee, My deepest sympathies...and thanks for taking the time through ALL of this to keep us updated. It wasn't necessary, of course, but all of us your loyal readers deeply care. (I had to laugh about your mother's urn comment...it reminded me of my Mom making a vaguely similar comment about cremation; however, she wants her ashes sprinkled somewhere in the Florida Keys). Take care, my friend... Chris |
|
| Author: | bspitler [ Wed Aug 15, 2012 2:21 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I haven't the words. Deepest sympathies Mr. Lee, and God Bless. Sincerely, Brandon Lee Spitler. |
|
| Author: | bigheadsballsack [ Wed Aug 15, 2012 11:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I'm so sorry to hear this. My deepest sympathy to you and your family at this time. May she finally rest in peace. Gary |
|
| Author: | Demonizer [ Wed Aug 15, 2012 6:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My sympathies, and I hope that the movie was good enough to provide a pleasant distraction for a while. |
|
| Author: | John Copeland [ Thu Aug 16, 2012 9:44 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My sympathies. Losing my parents is one of my biggest fears and this has to be a hell of a tough time for you. Take care. |
|
| Author: | AreYouMorbid [ Fri Aug 17, 2012 3:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My condolences, man. Hope you're finding plenty of comfort. --Ryan H. |
|
| Author: | chuckrios [ Fri Aug 17, 2012 4:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Lee, Please take comfort in knowing that we are behind you in your time of need. I lost my grandfather last year to old age and all that was left were the good times and the memories shared. My grandfather used to have me repeat a special saying every time I saw him. It goes something like this, "I'm happy, I'm healthy, and I’m wealthy." He was a true hero, the last of a dying breed; WW2 vet, purple heart, retired twice, lived for the moment kind of guy, and thanks to his positive outlook on life and his stoic wisdom, so far I have achieved two out of the three of his magic dictum. Still shooting for the third... If he was alive today I ‘m sure he would say to me, “Hey, that ain’t half bad, kid!” Nope grandpa, not bad at all. Stay strong and all the best to you, Chuck Rios |
|
| Author: | pegleg [ Fri Aug 17, 2012 1:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My sympathies, Lee. It sounds like the way my own mother went, years ago. I'm glad she had a good & long life. Pegleg |
|
| Author: | squeakytherat [ Fri Aug 17, 2012 2:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My deepest and heartfelt sympathies squeaks |
|
| Author: | splatterhead4ever [ Sat Aug 18, 2012 11:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
It's amazing how you handle everything. You are truly one of a kind. Your mom couldn't have asked for a better son. Best of luck with the remaining details and have a good trip. |
|
| Author: | DecayedFace [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 3:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
O |
|
| Author: | mangusta [ Mon Aug 20, 2012 7:53 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I'm so sorry for your loss. I can imagine you may not be in the mood for travel and socializing, but I hope you'll enjoy your stay in Poland. Polish fans are looking forward to meet you. Regards Karolina |
|
| Author: | Edward Lee [ Tue Aug 21, 2012 12:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
My dear friends: for your comforting words and condolences I am incapable of fully expressing my gratitude because my gratitude transcends written words. You all been here for me since day one and that certainly was a major reason that I was able to get through this intact. I will never forget any of you. Love, Edward Lee |
|
| Author: | Jack Staynes [ Sun Sep 16, 2012 7:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
I'm so sorry to hear this Ed. There's me sending you a PM yesterday like a complete Ass with no idea what's going on in your life. It sounds like you've been doing everything you could for her to be as comfortable and well looked after and I don't think a mother could want anything more from her son. Take care and my thoughts are with you Jack |
|
| Author: | dutchgorelover [ Mon Sep 17, 2012 10:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: FINALITY |
Take your time Edward. You have had very rough times. Hope writing will be a good medicine for the terrible loss you suffered. It's the most dreadfull things a man can suffer, death of a familymember. THey say time heals wounds, i hope so for you too. Will wait patiently for your new book. When it arrives, usually by Jizzlefinger, it's a pleasant day. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ] |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|