The Rising was great, but since then I've burned out on zombies so I got to admit, I laughed my ass off at this.

Tt

Brilliant!!

Funny!!

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She stole the keys to my house and then she locked herself out.

Placebo, Lady of the Flowers

That's great! You can go nuts with that idea!

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Eulogies II: Tales from the Cellar

http://www.facebook.com/groups/167261980056002/

That's crazy.

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“The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary. Men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.” - Joseph Conrad.

My version may not have the intensity or action or depth of character of the original, but you certainly can't argue that it's HAPPIER!

--Jeff

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Lost Homicidal Maniac (Answers to "Shirley") The fourth Andrew Mayhem novel is available NOW for $2.99! http://tinyurl.com/6n4rujb

All you needed was for a cowboy to come, kiss a girl, then ride away.

And since Steve Vernon is a big fan of your's, I am going to pick up Dweller. Steve knows.

Tt

Interview with the Vampire without Vampires.

"He waited for the interviewee. But no one showed up. So he went home."

Jaws without a shark.

"Betty went to the beach. She was stung by a jellyfish. But she still had a good time."

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Eulogies II: Tales from the Cellar

http://www.facebook.com/groups/167261980056002/

I considered adding a cowboy, but then people would be all like "That was good fun, but not nearly as entertaining as LONG HORN, BIG SHAGGY" and I'd have to pout.

I can get behind INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE WITHOUT VAMPIRES, but sharks should never be removed from a creative work. Almost all books and movies would benefit from a good shark attack scene...or, to be perfectly honest, a scene with a friendly shark who causes no harm to anybody.

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Lost Homicidal Maniac (Answers to "Shirley") The fourth Andrew Mayhem novel is available NOW for $2.99! http://tinyurl.com/6n4rujb

Great White Jaws

As the men in their fishing boat, held the meat out over the open sea, a large gray fin cut through the water like a scalpel on soft flesh. A few feet before reaching the hunk of meat, the shark shot out of the water, opening its giant jaws in a beautiful, Trident-white smile. The men stared in wonder at its beautiful, razor sharp and braces-straight mouth as it posed, seemingly frozen in mid-air, before dropping from sight and swimming away.

"Why didn't he take the bait?" a man asked.

"Are you kidding?" asked the captain. "If I had a set of teeth like that, I wouldn't want to get them bloody either."

THE END.

How can one message board thread contain so much genius???

Best zombie story ever.

It's a gift.